The short story? A forty-something Norwegian by birth, Australian by choice, NZ resident who sounds American. True blue Libertarian, Master of English Literature, nearly finished a law degree, third culture child who never stays anywhere for long. Happily married. Gamer. Trying not to grow old. And beach lover. Crazy cat lady. Belvedere consumer.
I shared my amazement at my own cleverness on Facebook. This morning, a very astute lady I really like interacting with commented:
Friend’s comment: And a mom?
Me: I might add it back in. John says it’s sad when women feel they have to define themselves as that … and to work on defining myself with other qualities too. But it’s a huge part of who I am.
Now, leaving the birthing, raising, and loving of my two sons out of this was actually on purpose. But after a lot of thought. I’ve always said mother of two before. And it’s not because they’re both grown ups now (18 and 20).
My husband always comments how sad it is that some women only define themselves as mothers. Or the title/role gets flung into situations where you would never hear journalists, presenters, or average people say, ‘father of two’. “The woman, a mother of two, was seen yelling at the grocery store clerk.” “The case was assigned to the new ADA, a mother of 1.”
He thinks women, me included, should be more assertive about their other qualities and skills, especially when the mother part doesn’t really have an effect on the context of the description. And I sort of agree. I love my boys. I am their mother. I cherish them and enjoy them and I spent 20 years of my life so far raising them. They are a joy. But I am so much more.
After my FB friend queried it though, I’ve decided to put it back in for my online presence. I mean, the topics here are completely likely to cover those two at some point.
I’m curious what other peoples’ opinions are on this.